Mayonnaise Solved
For some reason, Germans seem to think that mayonnaise is candy. It’s not: it’s an emulsion made of eggs, oil, mustard, and lemon juice. No sugar. But one of the first things newcomers here discover is the wide variety of things labelled “Salat,” which would seem to be “salad.” Instead, it seems to mean “sweet mayonnaise-y glop,” be it Eiersalat, Fleischsalat, Wurstsalat, Nudelsalat, or whatever.
Germans just like their mayonnaise sweet, which explains the success of “Miracel Whip,” pronounced mir-a-CELL vip.” (Spelling it like English would get it pronounced “mir-OCK-luh.”) And while this can be okay in prepared potato salad, it just doesn’t cut it for most of the uses Anglo-American folks find for it, most notably on sandwiches or as a base for 1000 Island dressing.
In France, I discovered Maille Mayonnaise de Dijon. It’s not, as you might think, that weird substance marketed as “Dijonnaise” (although Maille does sell one of those), but, rather, the best mayonnaise I’ve found over here, with just a tiny tang of their famous Dijon mustard at the end. And, having schlepped it all the way back here in my luggage two years ago, I found it, not only at Galleries Lafayette (where you’d expect it), but at a couple of the normal grocery chains in Berlin.
To celebrate, I made myself a PLT one afternoon: Pfefferbauch, lettuce, and tomato. Pfefferbauch is a hard-to-find coldcut that’s not a million miles away from bacon, but more like salami in texture. It was a perfect American-French-German combo.
Incidentally, yes, Hellmann’s is available at those awful “American” sections in department store food sections, but it’s very expensive. Best Foods tried, through their German partner, to introduce it to Germany a few years ago, but discontinued it after a couple of months without really trying to sell it, although they had television ads about Herr Hellmann bringing his mother’s recipe to the New World and everything.
And anyway, it’s time to make your contribution to ending the seemingly-ongoing Franco-Prussian War around here. Check it out.
ew
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.
July 19th, 2007 at 12:41 am
Oh hell yes I have had this problem in Germany. Mayo is so terrible, and for exactly the reason you say, it has SUGAR in it. What the hell are people thinking?
I’ve made my own mayo on occasion here, but the last few times I tried it simply WOULD NOT emulsify. Incidentally, I’ve read that mayo will not emulsify if a storm’s a-brewin’. I don’t know if that’s true, but both times it failed, a storm was indeed a-brewin’.
In spain I had some terrific mayo, which was not like american mayo, but it was made entirely from only olive oil and egg, and it was fantastic. At the bio store here in F-hain I found some kind of olive oil mayo, which turned out to be made from only 25% olive oil and the rest some other (canola probably), but it didn’t have added sugar and it’s really good.
But let’s get to the heart of the matter: The real reason someone would need TRUE mayo is to make bleu cheese dressing, which is nigh unto impossible to find here. Sure you can find those little triangular bottles of roquefort dressing, but they are nothing compared to a good jar of Lighthouse or Marie’s bleu cheese dressing. Ironic, isn’t it, in a land where you can find (in any large department store) a terrific assortment of bleu cheeses from France.
July 23rd, 2007 at 5:36 pm
Is “Miracelwhip” not just some kind of branded salad cream? i.e. not Mayonnaise at all, but something quite different – a cheap replacement?
July 23rd, 2007 at 6:00 pm
We’re getting into semantics here. Miracle Whip exists between mayonnaise and salad cream, the latter being a substance totally unknown in the U.S., where Miracle Whip originated. I’d take it over salad cream, the Heinz version of which I think is one of the most awful things I’ve tasted, but I hope never to have to make the choice.
July 24th, 2007 at 12:20 pm
You’ve never tasted “Happy Shopper” brand salad cream then (it’s/it was a British thing, a cheap brand for corner shops and independent minimarkets), and you should be a very, very grateful man for that. And semantics hin oder her, mayonnaise is mayonnaise, and nothing else is.
August 13th, 2007 at 5:26 pm
Actually, if you go into phonetics, it’d be pronounced Mirakell-Vipp…
(Almost) never eating Mayo OR Salatcreme myself I am surprised to learn the German versions contain sugar (definitely not a true ingredient) – but is this true for all (big) brands really? Kraft? Thomy? Kühne? Hamker?